A Christmas Funny

Well we have begun the task of Christmas shopping for Benjamin. We are on a SUPER tight budget this year, so gifts are going to be pretty small, but I have managed to find a couple of used items I think he will really enjoy. And so, since I purchased used, I will not have to pry his toys out of their packaging. However, having done that before, I heard this song by Sara Groves on the radio and about died laughing.

You can download the song for free at: http://www.inorecords.com/v2/news.php?id=20

In case you don't want to download it, here are the words:

Nothing makes me lose my cool like
Toy packaging
Ask the kids to leave the room for
Toy packaging
I have no choice the money's spent
I've worked for hours to make a dent
I guess it's anger management
Toy packaging


Nothing makes me lose my cool like
Toy packaging
Ask the kids please leave the room it's time for
Toy packaging
I'm drawing up a battle plan to extricate this robot man
My self-esteem is in the can
Toy packaging


In the old days you could hold a box and shake it
And hear the pieces rattling around
My eyes tear up with these grommets, tape and twisty ties
Remembering their beautiful sound


Nothing makes me lose my cool like toy packaging
Kids you need to leave the room, mom's opening toy packaging
I'm sorry you have to see this sight
You must be brave, no please don't cry
I promise it will be alright
I hope to have it by tonight
Nevermind this dynamite
Toy packaging

A Little Christmas Fun

This year one of our local water parks (Schlitterbahn) decided to do a whole set-up for Christmas. Our friends Brian and Katie invited us to come with them and we had a great time! The entire park was decked out in lights with Christmas music playing throughout. They had carolers dressed up like they were straight out of the Christmas Carol, light shows on the river, a toddler straw bale maze, snow machines with bubble snow, hot cider, hot chocolate, and my very favorite, cotton candy. :) They also had sledding down one of the water slides, and ice skating, but we didn't do these since we had the kiddos. It even turned chilly that night so we could enjoy our hot drinks and feel more in the Christmas mood. Benjamin loved all the lights and things to do. He wasn't real fond of being confined to the wagon, but with it being dark and there being a lot of people, we couldn't let him walk much. So he and Cale shared the wagon that Brian and Katie brought and shared lots of snacks. :)

Pointing out the lights

Brian, Katie, and Cale - we love these guys!

Family Shot

Cale wishing he could walk so he could join Benjamin in the Straw Bale Maze

Very independantly doing the maze

Cotton Candy. Woohoo!

Being bad parents and letting our son try some too. He actually was not all that impressed.
The boys in the wagon
Doing what he loves best!
Going through the "car wash" - In the summer they have water coming down, but for Christmas they had a snow machine set up inside it.
Praise the Lord for wonderful friends!

Grieving and Growing

My life,

Has led me down the road that's so uncertain

And now I am left alone and I am broken,

Trying to find my way,

Trying to find the faith that's gone

This time,I know that you are holding all the answers

I'm tired of losing hope and taking chances,

On roads that never seem,To be the ones that bring me home

Give me a revelation,

Show me what to do

Cause I've been trying to find my way,

I haven't got a clue

Tell me should I stay here,

Or do I need to move

Give me a revelation

I've got nothing without You

I've got nothing without You

I think God must know that songs often speak His truths to me because it seems like through this adoption journey He has brought me so many encouraging or challenging songs. The above lyrics are from the Third Day song "Revelation" and they speak pretty clearly where I feel I'm at right now.

The past week has been one of the toughest weeks I've had since we found out that we would not be bringing Jack home. I have literally had to force myself to get out of bed some mornings so I could care for Benjamin. The reality of how much I miss Jack hit me full force when we got back from Indiana. Some days the pain of it nearly swallowed me. Last week we took our car in to see what was wrong with it and I found myself having difficultly praying about it and realized that I was pretty mad at God and didn't feel like I could trust Him. I felt like He took us down such a hopeful road that we were not even seeking only to leave us in pain at the end. I've found myself really questioning whether God is in the details of our lives and feeling so frustrated because I know that God says in His Word that He cares about details, but my emotions don't feel it. I found myself becoming skeptical of faith in general, wondering if it really made any difference, or if God was just going to work is His way regardless. Let me tell you, satan was wreaking some havoc. But let me also tell you that God is GOOD! He gave me an amazing husband and I experienced the very truth of Ecclesiastes 4 which says that if one falls down, his friend can help him up.

A couple of months ago in my Believing God study, we studied the power of speaking God's word. I began compiling Scriptures in a spiral 3x5 notecard set and reading them aloud throughout the day. As I did, they began to become ingrained in my memory and the verses would come to mind at other times. In my Bible study, we learned that the only way to come up against the enemy is through God's word and that often speaking the word allowed cements it into our being. One thing that was said in our video that impacted me was that satan cannot read our thoughts, but he can hear our words. When we speak out those Scriptures it may just sound like our voice to us, but it sounds like God to the devil. Thus the Word becomes our sword. I also learned that while the devil cannot hear our thoughts, he memorizes our weaknesses and uses them against us when he sees an opportune time. So as I was learning all this, I got really excited and shared it with Matt.

Back to last week. Matt and I were out for a walk and I was sharing some of what had been going on in my mind and Matt began to share those very truths that I had shared with him and it was powerful. I began to realize that satan knew the power of God's word and so was doing his best to lead me to think on other things. I was getting so frustrated with the lack of answers through the whole adoption process and I was letting my frustration become directed at God. Then came the depression as I felt that life was hopeless. Now that I have spent a couple of days looking at things in light of truth, I can hardly believe I fell for some of the lies I did. It's amazing what happens when light is shined in dark places. But God is good and very patient with me, even when I resist His pruning.

So for now, this is my verse and I am clinging to it.

"I remember my affliction and my wandering, the bitterness and the gall. I well remember them, and my soul is downcast within me. Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness. I say to myself, 'the LORD is my portion; therefore I will wait for Him.' " Lamentations 3:19-24

I know that God the creator of the universe cares even about each sparrow that falls, so I have to believe that he cares for sweet little Jack and that He will watch over and protect him. It's hard not knowing how he is doing and yet maintaining that trust that the Lord knows and that He loves Jack even more than I do.

And so I still do not know why God took us down this road and led us to California to fall in love with a precious little boy named Jack, but I know that He is sovereign and that He is still in control. And if He chooses at a later date to bring Jack into our family, we will be ready, but if not, I'm going to trust He has a better plan. And today I'm praising Him for being my portion and giving me joy in the midst of pain.

Going to Grandpa and Grandma Anderson's house

We just got back from a great trip to Indiana. We spent half our time in Terre Haute and the other half in Marion. Benjamin has become quite the little traveler between going to California and going to Indiana all in one month. We truly enjoyed our time away, but now we are desperately in need of some routine!

Benjamin had 10 days of constant attention from grandparents and aunts and uncles. He LOVED it! While we were at my family's house, he and my brother John had a great time playing. We enjoyed having him constantly entertained and had fun playing games and watching movies with my siblings. It's really hitting me that there may not be that many more years where all of us Anderson kids will be home for at least one holiday a year. My brother Will is in college and has a summer job in Indy and it won't be long before Joel, Melody, and Esther are in college as well. So I felt so blessed to be there with everyone. My sister Rachel and her husband got to be there as well and we got to see sonogram pictures of there little expected blessing. I am so excited for Benjamin to have a little cousin to play with when we go home.

Along with many other fun activities, we had some fun after dinner on Thanksgiving. We had read about dropping mentos in a two liter of diet coke and decided to try it out for ourselves. I just chuckled to myself and we all traipsed out to the soccer field behind my parents house to try our little experiment. Who needs a football game anyway? :) The experiment was a success and lots of fun! I'm so thankful for my family and for the godly heritage that I have and that my siblings are in the middle of right now. I took almost 200 pictures while we were home, but here are the few I weeded out to share. Hope you enjoy! Musical as usual

Celebrating Will's birthday a little late - the big "18"

More from our leaf raking party

Playing in the leaves with Aunt Melody

Riding a horse with help from Aunt Bekah

John loves his kitty

Leaf raking party!

Playing outside and loving it as usual

Uncle John and Benjamin were buds

Benjamin fell asleep in Uncle Joel's arms and they both took a nap

Fun times playing games

Benjamin with his beautiful Aunt Melody

Anderson/Agapie/Davis Family Photo

Thanksgiving entertainment - putting Mentos in Diet Coke and watching the the fountain!

Visit to Grandpa and Grandma Davis

After our visit with my family in Terre Haute, we went up to Marion to visit with Matt's family. We had a great time visiting and playing games and Benjamin enjoyed the continuation of constant attention!

Climbing up the ladder all by himself!
Finding all the things he wasn't supposed to touch

Helping around the house

Going to play at the mall - already driving!

Fun on the slide

Playing with Great Grandma Hilliman

Ready to go out in the cold!

Watching Daddy and Grandma play a game and calling the letters "two"

Playing with Aunt Connie

Driving again!

Swimming

I never cease to be amazed at what a water lover Benjamin is. While we were visiting Matt's family, his dad took us to the YMCA so Benjamin could swim. He LOVED it. They had a great set up for kids that included a water slide and a splash area. The slide was closed and Benjamin wasn't big enough for it, but he loved the splash area. I'm definitely seeing some swimming lessons in the future.

Playing in the fun splash area
Pointing out something fun

Jumping off the end of the slide into grandpa's arms

Fun in the Snow

While we were in Marion visiting Matt's family, it snowed quite a bit. Seeing the ground blanketed with a fresh coat of snow is always so pretty. I was so excited to let Benjamin go out and play in it. He was not as excited about it though and liked it much better from the window. We were determined that he experience it and made a snowman and snow angels, but he is either too young, or a true Texas baby because he was not impressed.

Benjamin's little snow angel